The post where I am in Iowa now

Moving sucks.

There's really no two ways about it.  Moving is a huge pain.  And it's not just the "putting everything you own in boxes, lifting those boxes into a truck, driving that truck, lifting the boxes out of the truck and then taking everything you own out of boxes" part of moving that is hard.  You spend a day changing your mailing address at all the places that have your mailing address.  You spend a day driving around trying to figure out where to buy milk.  You're crazy poor because everything about moving costs money.  It's just a headache.

But, now that Kate and I are settling in Coralville, I thought I would gather some of my thoughts of things I learned about moving.  My more charitable readers will think that this is for their benefit: so that they can learn from my experience and not repeat my mistakes.  My less charitable readers will think I am doing this for my own benefit, so that I can easily find this later since I don't keep a journal.  You're all right.

First, boxes.  Every move I've made in the past has involved scrounging boxes from wherever I could find them, usually work, and packing my stuff in them.  I save boxes from Amazon and anywhere else I can think of.  I did some of that this time, but I also just bought boxes.



Those boxes were awesome.  They were about $20 for a 10-pack at Sam's club (or $40 for a 12 pack anywhere else - not hard to do that math).  What I like about buying boxes instead of scavenging boxes is that they are all exactly the same size, which makes stacking them super-easy and efficient.  No problems trying to tetris these guys around when I am putting them in the truck or unloading them in the new apartment.  A- to buying boxes.  I can't give it a higher score because it was pretty expensive, which makes me sad.

Next, something that I did not believe in despite the suggestion of my lovely wife and my handsome brother (You know which one you are): Packing wrap.  It's basically seran wrap, but for packing.



This stuff was AWESOME.  And, more importantly, super cheap.  For $5, I got 1000 feet of it at the Uhaul place.  I'm guessing you could find it cheaper on Amazon or somewhere if you look.  I used this to wrap lots of awkwardly shaped things into bundles.  All our curtain rods, bundled and wrapped so they stick together.  Shelves from a big storage unit thingy, wrapped so that they are all in one place and easier to carry.  Seriously, if you learn nothing else from this post, buy some dang wrap for your next move.  A+ to this stuff.

Another thing we thought would make our lives easier was space bags.  These are supposed to be magical, and they kind of are, but they're also pretty unreliable.  The idea is that you have a big bag that you put stuff in (clothes, blankets, etc), then vacuum out the air, making the bag way smaller.



The problem is, if they are not 100% air tight, you might as well be using garbage bags.  Once the air leaks out, they plump back up to their original size.  In our experience, about 30% had leaks when they were brand new, and another 30% sprung leaks between the time they got packed and the time they got unpacked.  So, not a super-great batting average (though, I guess 400 is actually a super-great batting average, but baseball is another question entirely).  We paired these with big plastic storage bins, which helped a bit.  Vacuum out the air from a space bag, throw it in a storage bin, pack stuff around it, and tape it shut.  That way, when it starts to leak, the clothes have no room to expand into.  But between the price and the not-as-magical-as-advertised problem, I have to give space bags a D.  We threw them all away when we got here and are not planning on ever buying them again.

The last couple things are not products, but rather things I would do differently.  When we were packing, we tried to label things as specifically as we could (rather than just labeling the box with the room it would go to).  We thought this would make it easier to find stuff when we unpacked.  The problem was that while we knew that yarn goes in the baby's bedroom, the people who helped us move didn't.  So all the boxes just got put down wherever, and it took about a day of me moving boxes around the apartment just to get everything in the right room so we could start unpacking.  If I were moving again, I would put a big, generic label on every box that fell into one of maybe 8 or 10 categories (Bathroom, kitchen, books, etc), and then a smaller, more specific label of what exactly is in that box.  The big label will help direct things to the right general area, and the small label will help you organize and unpack.

I would also pack a few boxes or suitcases or something as if we were going on a week's vacation.  Everything I need to live for a week: underwear, phone charger, toothbrush, pillow, all that good stuff.  These need to be clearly marked and kept separate from everything else.  We tried to do this, but didn't do very well, so the first night was a mess of "I've been in the car all day and I just want to brush my dang teeth."  The first few days will be like that, so pack accordingly.

Before you move (far enough before that you are not a crazy stress-ball), plan a few days of easy meals with a few simple ingredients.  We ended up eating out a whole lot that first week because we were too tired and stressed to think about how adults feed themselves.  Make a meal plan (in advance), make a shopping list (in advance), and you'll be able to go for a quick run to the store the first day.

All in all, a successful move, in that my family is now successfully in a new place, all our stuff is here, and we are happy.  And, importantly, now that we're settling in, I'll get back to the Blog.  Harry Potter, beware.  I'm coming for you, boy...

Welcome, Cyborg Overlords!

Now they just need to make a robot that does my old job from McDonald's: stand in the drive through window and get yelled at for the order being wrong.  I guess they could have just replaced me with a cardboard cutout of a pimply faced teenager with a voice bubble that said "I'm very sorry, sir"

Review: The Long Halloween

Batman: The Long Halloween is a followup to the Haunted Knight stories I reviewed a couple weeks ago.  Where Haunted Knight was a collection of unrelated short stories, The Long Halloween was a monthly special that ran for one year, from October 1996 to October 1997.  It follows the same continuity as Haunted Knight, but it stands mostly alone as its own story.  The main story is that Batman, Gordon, and Dent are all working to find a serial killer in Gotham who kills on holidays.

The Long Halloween is often praised as one of the greatest Batman comics of all time, and with good reason.  The themes of the story (though not much of the plot itself) are very strongly felt in Christopher Nolan's Dark Knight movies.  I wanted to link somebody else describing all the similarities, but shockingly, I can't find anyone who has gone through and done that.  Come on, internet, get your act together.  I may come back and do that one of these days.   But not today.  Today I'm just going to talk about what I liked, what I didn't like, and how the book fares overall.  I will avoid major spoilers for this story, but I will mention plot points that are common in the Batman universe (ie, Harvey Dent becomes Two-Face, etc)

I feel like the art is even better than in Haunted Knight, even though it is the same artist.  I guess a few years of practice makes a difference.  The uses of shadow and blocks of solid color that I liked so much in Haunted Knight are more pronounced here.

I love beleaguered, haggard Gordon in his dark office

And they are used well for foreshadowing.  For example, Harvey Dent's face is often shown in half-shadow, hinting at his later transformation into Two-Face.

The book has some very interesting themes, both for the good guys and the bad guys.  On the bad-guy side, it talks about the transformation of Gotham from a mob-run town to a super-villain-run town.  The old mobsters are shown trying to deal with the influx of "freaks" into Gotham, and trying to hold on to their power and influence in a changing world.

On the good-guy side, we see the unsteady alliance between Gotham's police force (Captain Jim Gordon), prosecutor (District Attorney Harvey Dent) and Batman (Batman).  Each of them suspects the other two of being the villain (for reasons that are believable and well written, I might add), but has to rely on them anyway.  This theme of unsteady, forced trust makes for a surprisingly thought provoking read.

Now, for some of the bad.  One problem stems from the way this story was told (13 "chapters" released as 13 separate comic books over the course of a year).  There is a single story running through the whole thing (an unknown serial killer in Gotham), but each chapter has its own story as well.  And each chapter's individual story is about a different villain from Batman's Rogues' Gallery.  The first time I read this, it didn't bother me, but this time through it felt a bit forced.  In January, Batman investigates the Holiday Killer and faces off with Joker.  In March, Batman investigates the Holiday Killer and faces off with Poison Ivy.  Every month could be summed up that way.

Though this does lead to some pretty cool cover art for the different months

This could be explained away as "Batman is crazy busy, and even when he is in a long, drawn-out investigation there are always other fires to put out," but it just didn't feel that way to me.  Like I said, not bad, but a little forced.  I don't like when I can see what's going on backstage in the author's head.

Another problem is with the story itself.  I enjoyed it right up to the end, when it felt like Jeph Loeb traveled 15 years into the future, watched the LOST finale, and said "man, what a great way to end things!"

What if the whole thing was just a dream the polar bear had?

The big surprise ending was kind of dumb.  Like the villain-of-the-month problem, it just felt forced, like the publisher really really wanted a surprise, but the writers hadn't planned on one.

The last criticism I have will be a bigger problem for some than others.  That is that this book is not as accessible as it might me.  There were a few times reading it when I thought "if I didn't know a lot of Batman mythos, I'd be lost here."  So, not a bad book by any means, but probably not the one I'd recommend as someone's first book to read.

All in all, a very satisfying read (even if the ending was marred with a dumb, dumb twist), with beautiful art and a good story.

I'll miss the Arb

*above the post note: I wrote this post last week before the move and just didn't get it posted. So it refers to the move in the future tense instead of the past. Going through and changing that was a hassle, so I left it. *   

I am pretty out of shape.  Not as bad as I could be, but I'm not where I'd like to be.  So, in the last year or two, I have taken up running.  There was a big break in the middle where it was too cold to run outside, or when Kate was super-pregnant, so I guess I haven't been terribly consistent.  But I have enjoyed it.

One thing that has made running less of a chore and more something I can enjoy is the Arb.  Nichols Arboretum.

Meh.  Close enough

The Arb is one thing I will really miss when we leave Ann Arbor.  It's just a few minutes' walk from my lab, so I try to go running there a couple times a week.  Some weeks are more successful than others, but I always try.  Last week, while I was on a run, I stopped for some pictures so I can remember how beautiful this place is.

I usually enter the Arb here, where I get to walk through cultivated gardens.

Once I'm in the Arb proper, there is a paved path that runs along the Huron River.

Right along that path there are a couple of places to stop and stretch or catch my breath

I love the Arb because there are big, paved paths...

...and little paths that branch off and go interesting places.

There are fields of wildflowers and scrub with paths just mowed through.

As you run, you see flowers and trees and hear the sound of the Huron.

And it's secluded enough that you often run into wildlife.

Most of all, I just love being outside, enjoying the view while I run.  It's so much better than running through a neighborhood or on a treadmill.  

I love the Arb.  I'll miss the Arb.  The only thing I don't like: since it's down in a river basin, you have to go down a big hill right at the beginning.  Which means going up a big hill at the end.

Bedtime songs

Every night around 7, we put little Hakon to bed.  While he eats, Kate and I sing a couple songs to him as part of the "now you seriously need to sleep for 12 hours" routine.  Here are a couple of our favorite songs to sing for him.








Any suggestions?  Must be easy to play on the guitar and easy to remember all the words.  Also fun.

3 things I would change about Divergent

In our effort to figure out how to tell good stories, Kate and I spend a fair amount of time pulling apart popular stories to see what makes them tick.  It's kind of how serial killers do with animals, but less likely to get us arrested.  We do this a lot to Harry Potter, but in the interest of fairness, I thought I should post some thoughts on another book that's gotten a lot of attention lately: Divergent.

Divergent has some major problems, but I think they can all be fixed by changing three small things.

1. The setting
2. The story
3. All of the characters

OK, so maybe those things aren't that small.  But the story is so fundamentally broken that this is the bare minimum set of things that has to change to make it work.  Before I jump into my criticism, I should disclose that I did not finish the series, which is rare for me.



But it was just too bad to keep reading.  I read the first book and maybe half of the second before I gave up.

In the interest of writing a post that has a reasonable chance of getting read, I'm going to limit myself to writing only about problems with the setting (by which I mean the world in which Divergent is set).  I'll tear apart the characters and story another day.

Divergent is set in a dystopian, post-apocalyptic future.  Following some un-stated cataclysm, society began again in Chicago.  Lake Michigan has dried up, presumably as a result of whatever happened to break the world.  So, without the lake there, what makes this an attractive place to settle?  To feed a population the size of the one described in Divergent, you would have to have a pretty big farming operation, but Chicago is a huge city.  In order to farm there, they would have had to demolish streets and buildings, haul away all the concrete and rebar, and irrigate the land (assuming that they found themselves a source of water).  Or, they would have to build the farms outside the city and haul all their food 20 miles. But if they're farming outside the city, and the city itself has no water, it would make more sense to settle out nearer the farms.

So, why found your society in a place with no source of fresh water and no farmable land?  There is actually a good reason.

Turns out Veronica Roth wrote this book while attending Northwestern University on the outskirts of Chicago.  This is really the only good reason to set it in Chicago: because it was the big city she saw right in front of her, and she couldn't be bothered to think up a different setting.  I might have overstated how good of a reason there was.

So, for whatever reason, the society was founded in Chicago.  But the founders of this new society disagreed about what principles this society should be built upon.  This lead to population being split into five "factions," each based on a different character trait (honestly, bravery, selflessness, love, and intelligence).

This one got left out for some reason

The Faction system is extremely silly.  It is the way a 13 year old would view splitting up the world.  For one thing, the five traits are all objectively "good."  There is no faction founded on "bad" principles like "ruthless self interest" or "we are stronger, so we take whatever we need from the weak."  There is not even a faction based on the neutralish principles like "whatever has to be done to survive" or "practicality."  All of them are bumper-sticker soundbytes of a classic utopia.  Were other ideas ever presented?  Were other ideas ever tried?  We never find that out.

When kids turn 16 in this world, they get to pick whether to stay in the faction where they grew up or switch to a different one.  Part of this ritual is a test where the kid is told which faction they belong in.

Think "Sorting Hat Ripoff," only more sciency

But that test is not binding, and the results are kept secret.  What, then, is the point of the test?  Everybody in the story freaks out about how this test will decide their future, but then they can (and in many cases do) choose to completely ignore the results.  All the test does, according to the story, is look into your mind/soul/personality and tell you where you would be the best fit.  It seems to me like Veronica Roth wrote the original draft more like the Sorting Hat in Harry Potter, then in later revisions, she decided that this didn't work.  So she decided to make the test results just a friendly suggestion, but didn't bother to change anybody's feelings and anxieties about the test.  The only purpose I can see to the test is for the story.  Our heroine has an unusual, surprising result, which makes her all angsty.  This makes it seem more like a plot device and less like an element of an organic, real world.

So, after the test that doesn't matter, the teenagers go to live with the factions that make no sense.  Whatever.  But some of the kids don't end up fitting in their new faction.  These kids are kicked to the curb and have to live the rest of their lives as "factionless" hobos.  We see these people a few times in the book looking like stereotypical homeless folk.

"Spare some change?"

These factionless are a huge sticking point for me.  We have a large portion of the population (I think it was even said that there were more of them than in any one faction) who live in refrigerator boxes on the street and no one wants to take them in?  There's even a faction dedicated to charity and taking care of their fellow man, and they don't do more than set up soup kitchens for the factionless.  But the future is a harsh world, so I get no one going out of their way to help these folks.  What surprises me is that nobody takes advantage of them either.  They don't conscript them into an army, or slave labor, or anything.

There are lots of creative uses for the factionless

They are just part of the scenery.  I know they play some role in the later books, but that's just not enough for me.  They've been there for decades, and nobody in the world seems to have noticed.

While we're on the subject of the factionless, why do they stick around?  I get that you will always get some small percentage of any population that just gives up and doesn't have any initiative, but are there no factionless who just leave Chicago?  They could go set up their own civilization somewhere else.  Or why don't they revolt?  There are enough of them that they could take over the farms that feed everybody else.  Just because this society has chosen to cast them out doesn't mean they have to accept it.  This is post-apocalyptic fiction, for goodness sake.  There should be plenty of de-populated places to go and settle, plenty of outcasts to join, and plenty of weaker parties to conquer.  What is keeping them there, living on the streets?  I'll give you a hint: the plot.  These people exist because Roth needs them for the future books.

OK, this post is getting long and there's so much more to say about why the world of Divergent doesn't work.  For now I'll leave it with this.  The world centers around a society that inexplicably started up in a concrete jungle with no water.  The people are divided into five factions that seem like they were founded by a group of 13 year olds.  At a certain age, people take a meaningless test that is more like a high school aptitude test than a life changing event, but it is treated like the biggest day in anyone's life.  And there is a whole group of homeless people who nobody (least of all the factionless themselves) seems to notice.

This world just doesn't work.  I would much rather read a story in which the factions were realistic.  Or where the factionless were a part of the story instead of a part of the scenery.  These things feel like the cheap cardboard sets in the old Star Trek series - they're just there so that the main characters can say "wow, what a strange alien world!"

Coping with no air conditioner

Our AC has been broken for a very, very long time.  Since we are moving soon, we finally gave up on getting it fixed and bought a very powerful fan.  Which our dumb dog just loves.  So, for your viewing pleasure, here is Majzy hogging our fan.